When I was in college, I teased my boyfriend about finding me too late, because we didn't get to go to the prom together.
You can only imagine what it will be like for the guy I end up with.
During a dry spell when my best short friend and I were both single, we made up lists of requirements for our perfect man. Mine featured silly things like "must know how to play guitar" and "should be tall enough for me to be able to wear my favorite heels with him."
This is idiotic. A man could just wind up fulfilling these requirements through nothing but coincidence. My new list, detailed here, will be less about matching a man to the specifications and more about finding a man that will actively fulfill the conditions.
-Must have saved the life of a baby fur seal. (Please note that it MUST be a fur seal and yes they are endangered so you'd better get started.)
-Should be versed in cooking and a master at baking chocolate souffles.
-Needs to own the entire Lord of the Rings Trilogy and all of the Star Wars movies.
-Must live/move within walking distance.
-Enjoys spending romantic weekends on his personal yacht.
-Possesses the loudest laugh in the theater, easily muffling mine and saving me from embarrassment.
-Invests in a company at the forefront of research for developing a gluten free croissant.
-Has an uncontrollable urge to shower compliments upon brunette graduate students and calico kitties.
-Has run a marathon.
-Has won a tortilla eating contest.